Sunday, August 30, 2009

The Palin Precept: Type quietly, but speak volumes

Madame and I have done quite a bit of work since she stepped away from the Governor's desk. We've written a whole slew of Facebook notes over the past month or so. Oh boy, have they had a huge impact: altering a Senate health care reform bill, encouraging millions to watch Glenn Beck giving him sky high ratings, and causing the Great Opologizer to get all wee-weed up.

It's amazing to me how much 11 letters (or two words) and a pair of quotation marks have altered the health care reform discussion. I haven't done a word or character count check on our Word document for Madame's book recently, but it will be very interesting to see just what kind of an impact her book will be when it comes out next Spring. I'll betcha that with thousands of words and hundreds of pages, it'll speak volumes! I have a feeling that when it comes out, the Great Opologizer's response may be very much like this:

Now, Madame likes to post her Facebook notes pretty late, so I imagine that this is the response from the Great Opologizer every time she submits a post:

Credit to Seth Adam Smith at C4P

Teddy Roosevelt once said, "speak softly and carry a big stick". Some people refer to this as "Big Stick Diplomacy".

Well, Madame and I say, "Type quietly, but speak volumes". We call it the Palin Precept.

Friday, August 28, 2009

O Happy Day!

Credit to Anne from C4P for making this video.

I have so much posted on my Outlook calendar for today!

First, my favorite website declared today Sarah Palin Day, as today marks the anniversary of Madame being introduced as John McAnonymous's running mate in the 2008 Presidential election! I must clarify, I call Senator McCain, John McAnonymous. Madame is a lot more gracious than I am. She calls him Senator. When I was out on the campaign trail with Madame, there were all of these people working for the Senator who seemed to want to be referred to as "Anonymous". I don't know how the Senator kept track of them all. Did he number them? But, I digress. I was backstage when Madame gave her speech in Ohio. I was a bit jetlagged--that four hour time difference always seems to get to me--but it was a great speech. I shouldn't be surprised though; I've gotten to be the first one to read most of her speeches as she types them up, but it isn't quite the same as hearing them from her! Here is John McAnonymous introducing Madame and Madame introducing herself to America

Second, it is Madame's and First Dude 45's 21st anniversary today! I have been worried all week about what to get them for their anniversary. Thankfully, Madame had bookmarked Ebay from when she put the state jet on there while she was governor. I began processing some ideas: his and her snow machines, his and her fishing waders. No, those were all too expensive. Madame and First Dude are very frugal, so I thought that I should probably be frugal with the gift that I get for them. I decided to team up with the BOTUSes, and we went in on a gift together--his and her cell phone ringtones! We put "Hail to the Chief" on the First Dude's phone so that whenever Madame calls, that song plays. Hmm, I wonder if Madame becomes president some day if they will have to change the name of that song to "Hail to the Chiefess"? Then, we put "I Just Call You Mine" by Martina McBride on Madame's phone for when the First Dude.

Credit to Uffda at C4P.

The third thing on my Outlook calendar is John McAnonymous's birthday! I must not forget him. He presented Madame to the world, and he is an American hero. Happy 73rd birthday, Senator!

Whew! This day is going to make me want to go into hibernation mode for a while. There is so much going on! Happy Sarah Palin Day or what I like to call the "Re-birth of Conservatism" Day! Happy Anniversary, First Dude and Madame! Happy birthday, Senator McAnonymous!

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Meet my best friends, the BOTUSes!

If there is one thing (and I think there only may be one thing) that Madame and the Great Opologizer agree on, it is their love of Blackberries. Not the fruit, but the smart phone. I have been deemed the LOTUS, as Madame and I have done quite a bit of work together lately, but when Madame was governor, the BOTUSes (or is it BOTUSI, I don't know the plural form) did a lot of the work. The BOTUSes (the Blackberries of the United States) are my best friends. We spent a lot of time together. It's great because we are all multilingual (HTML, Javascript etc), so we can communicate with each other very well. I would call them my BFFs, but I don't want to sound like Meghan McCain. The BOTUSes were responsible for a lot of Madame's tweets as governor. They were even in a photo with her for her Runner's World interview. The BOTUSes and I agree that working for Madame is a lot of hard work, but it is good work. We love it. We are also quite impressed by Madame's multitasking ability. She has the ability to hold onto to both BOTUSes, Trig, and Trig's bottle all while talking to constituents with a smile on her face. Can you do that, Mr. President?

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Susan, Sarah, and Suffrage! Say that Five Times Fast!

As today marks the 89th anniversary of the passage of the 19th amendment, I thought I would recount a trip that I got to take with Madame 45 to New York earlier this summer. Meg "the Enforcer" Stapleton is originally from Auburn, NY, the same town that William Seward, the purchaser of Alaska, is from. We made a trip to Auburn to celebrate Alaska's big 5-0. Prior to that event, we had the chance to visit Seneca Falls, where a lot of the early events of the Women's Rights movement occurred. Unfortunately, I didn't get to see all of these amazing sites. Although I'm portable, I'm not very mobile. One of the women from the area that Madame visited was Susan B. Anthony, of whom Madame is a very big fan. In Susan's day, she didn't have a great sidekick, such as yours truly. (As a side note, I'm sorry; I need to work on my humility. I don't have a servant's heart like Madame. In fact, I have no heart at all. I'm just metal and plastic. It makes it very hard!) Susan got out her message by writing letters and giving speeches, and she really made an impact. I went surfing again and found some of Susan's quotes that remind me a lot of what Madame has to say:

"Cautious, careful people, always casting about to preserve their reputation and social standing, never can bring about a reform. Those who are really in earnest must be willing to be anything or nothing in the world's estimation, and publicly and privately, in season and out, avow their sympathy with despised and persecuted ideas and their advocates, and bear the consequences."
-Susan B. Anthony

"I’m not a member of the permanent political establishment. And I’ve learned quickly, these past few days, that if you’re not a member in good standing of the Washington elite, then some in the media consider a candidate unqualified for that reason alone.But here’s a little news flash for all those reporters and commentators: I’m not going to Washington to seek their good opinion — I’m going to Washington to serve the people of this country. Americans expect us to go to Washington for the right reasons, and not just to mingle with the right people."
-Sarah Palin

"Sweeter even than to have had the joy of caring for children of my own has it been to me to help bring about a better state of things for mothers generally, so their unborn little ones could not be willed away from them."
-Susan B. Anthony

"I'm pro-life. I'll do all I can to see every baby is created with a future and potential. The legislature should do all it can to protect human life. "
-Sarah Palin

Unfortunately, Susan didn't get to see women's suffrage passed in her lifetime. I know, though, that Madame feels very blessed by all the work that she did. Susan's work not only paved the way for women to vote, but paved the way for women in the working world, the athletic arena, and politics. Sarah spoke about to these rights on the campaign trail:

Credit to Seth Adam Smith at C4P for creating this video.

I think that Susan would be proud to see what has transpired due to her work, and Sarah is very thankful for Susan's work in giving women the opportunity to vote.

Now, who's ready for the 28th amendment? I want to vote too!

Monday, August 24, 2009

Did the LOTGOs get the swine flu?

Over the weekend, while the Great Opologizer and his family went off on vacation, some distressing news came across my Twitter from Drudge. Reuters reported that the White House's 10 year deficit projection was off by $2 trillion and was actually a whopping 9 trillion dollars, rather than $7.108 trillion!

Madame does not like the dizzying debt that our nation is accruing! She feels that Washington spends too much and that the American people can spend their own money better than the government can. She spoke about this in her farewell speech:

"We can resist enslavement to big central government that crushes hope and opportunity. We must be wary of government largesse. It doesn’t come free and often accepting it takes away everything that is free. Melting into Washington’s powerful and caretaking arms will only lead to suck away the incentive to work hard and chart our own course. This will only contribute to an unstable economy and dizzying national debt, and it will make us less free."

You see, Madame actually did the amazing thing called cutting a budget, rather than creating a deficit or growing a deficit, while she was governor (TOTUS, listen up here, you may have to explain this concept to big guy). In her first year in office, she cut her budget by more than $2 billion over her predecessor!

Perhaps we will write a Facebook post or an op-ed about this in the near future, but I have to ask my colleagues, the LOTGOs (laptops of the Great Opologizers), did you catch a computerized version of the swine flu? I have an updated version of McAfee virus scan, but maybe the LOTGOs don't. I don't know any other way, other than a virus,that they could be $2 trillion off in their deficit numbers. At least my version of Microsoft Excel doesn't make those kinds of errors! One of my friends, Madame's scientific calculator, can't even fit $9,000,000,000,000 on her screen without switching it into scientific notation!!

For some perspective, you could purchase almost 182 Alaskas (inflation adjusted) with the amount of money they were OFF with the deficit! You could also buy 1,740,644,038 teleprompters. If this keeps happening, President Obama may need them!

Saturday, August 22, 2009

A JPG is worth a thousand words

I don't have much to say today, but I did spend some time on google images this evening. I've posted some pictures ranging from the amusing to the serious. Sometimes, a JPG is worth a thousand words.

The Obama administration discusses tort(e) reform.

President Obama throws like a girl.

Madame 45 throws like a woman.

President Obama sings the national anthem.

Madame 45 sings the national anthem.

Sadly, this picture speaks for itself.

Happily, this picture speaks for itself.

President Obama fishing......ooops.

Madame 45 fishing.



Again, sometimes, JPGs are worth a thousand words.

I hope everyone has a great wee-weekend!

Friday, August 21, 2009

Rise and shine, tort reform!

I was jerked out of hibernation mode early this morning by Madame. "It's time to get to work, LOTUS", Madame said. "I want to get a post up early so that I can spend time with Willow and Piper before they go to school".

"But I haven't even had my javascript yet", I complained. I am not a morning laptop. I'm quite blurry-screened in the morning, but I looked down at my icon tray to see that it was before 6 AM.

"Just be glad I'm not taking you out moose hunting", she said.

I asked her what we'd be writing about. She told me that she wanted to tackle another issue of Obamacare. We had already looked at rationing of care and the sanctity of all life, end-of-life counseling, and one of the Great Opologizer's health policy advisers and the spending involved in health care reform. I wondered what topic would be next. She told me we were going to look at tort reform. "But what if President Obama thinks that all we're talking about is modifying a dessert recipe?", I asked.

"Oh, silly LOTUS, President Obama is a lawyer; he knows what tort reform is", Madame assured me.

So we went to writing her post. Over the past year, Madame has had a lot of silly ethics complaints and lawsuits thrown at her, but she has taken care of them all. She has some great people working with her: Thomas Van Fine (that's what I call him. He's quite the looker, for a human) and Meg "the Enforcer" Stapleton. So she knows that, sometimes, the lawsuit process needs to be reformed, because money is wasted on frivolous cases--whether it's in medicine or government ethics. So we talked a little bit about that in her post. Thankfully, she decided not to footnote these. That would have taken us forever to do! We talked about the excessive money spent on trial lawyers rather than doctors. She emphasized that, if controlling costs was key part of the reform, then tort reform needed to be in place. It was a rather good post. We even got to use some italics, bold font, and some heel(foot)notes. In your facebook, Katie Couric!

After the post, I looked back in "My Documents" to find Madame's State of the State Address that she wrote earlier this year. My friend the TOAK (Teleprompter of Alaska) participated in her presentation as you can see below. She talked about health care reform from about the 4:12 to 6:12 mark in the video. She discussed several aspects of health care reform: greater competition, more health care choices, and less litigation. She even talked about personal responsibility. Softy Southpaws like the government to be in charge of everything, but Madame thinks some of the greatest traits of Americans are self-sufficiency and self-determination. Part of health care is personally making smart choices. See for yourself what she has to say:

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Wee-Weed up, Mr.President?!?

Apparently the Great Opologizer had a nice little talk with his campaign volunteers, and had this to say:

And then last year just about this time, you'll recall that the Republicans had just nominated their Vice Presidential candidate, and everybody was -- the media was obsessed with it, and cable was 24 hours a day, and "Obama's lost his mojo." (Laughter.) You remember all that? (Laughter.) There's something about August going into September -- (laughter) -- where everybody in Washington gets all wee-weed up. (Laughter.)

Madame made everyone get all "wee-weed up", Mr. President? Yes, Mr. President, about this time last year Madame 45 was being introduced to the world, and this year she and I are the dynamic duo discussing your health care reform and your unfortunate desire for energy dependence. What does "wee-weed" mean though?

Here are some of my hypotheses:

1) Madame 45 makes President Obama want to cry, and "wee-weed" is liberalspeak for Wah!!!

2) Madame 45 makes him want to revert to his childhood where he can speak in gibberish again?

3) This little piggy went to market....this little piggy went wee-wee all the home!

4) Maybe the TOTUS got some signals crossed, and the President was reading about there being some weeds in the organic arugula garden at the White House.

5) I don't mean to get into toilet humor here because Piper and Trig are around, but does Madame 45 make Washington politicians and the media incontinent?

6)Does Madame 45 make Washington politicians and the media feel relegated to marijuana use (weed)? That would explain how her record has been misrepresented. Marijuana affects one's memory.

7) Is "wee-weed" the sound one makes when he "loses his mojo"?

8) Is becoming "wee-weed" a process by which you become dependent upon a teleprompter?

I certainly don't get it. The only time I get "wee-weed" is when someone mistypes with their left ring finger on my keyboard.

All I can say is, Mr. President, be prepared to be "wee-weed" up for a long time because Madame and I certainly aren't done yet!

H/T to C4P for the story and the C4P commenters for contributing to the hypotheses.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

How do you say "drill, baby, drill" in Portuguese?

Last night, Madame 45 approached me after she finished reading the Wall Street Journal. She threw her gloves on the floor and said, "OK, LOTUS, I've got my Naughty Monkeys on. The heels are on, and the gloves are off again"!

Woohoo, I thought, I love it when Madame is ready to fight! Plus, when she takes her gloves off before she types, she's a lot more gentle on my keys. I had to make sure I cued the music, for we were ready to write. I downloaded a new version of "Barracuda". This one is by Gretchen Wilson, a singer who Madame met on the campaign trail. I thought you all might like to see the music video:

I asked her what we were going to write about. She told me that the Great Opologizer was sending $2 billion to Brazil to fund off-shore drilling. No wonder Madame was so upset! She really does not like it when the President looks to other countries for oil. I understand. She has told me all about energy independence, ANWR, ACES, AGIA, and all the other acronyms. I 'm with her on the energy issue. I have plastic components in me, but the oil used to make them came from Saudi Arabia and Venezuela. I really wish my plastic was made from oil from Alaska, so that I can say I am truly Alaskan! But, I digress.

Madame went on to write about the need to drill in America which would provide jobs for Americans. She scolded the Great Opologizer for sending American money to Brazil rather than to help create American jobs and discover American oil. (TOTUS, if you are reading this, make sure you pass onto Big Guy that they don't speak Brazilian in Brazil, they speak Portuguese. Apparently, he was confused about language with Austria). Madame really brought out the sarcasm with her post.Here's an example:

"One has to wonder if Obama is playing politics and perhaps refusing a "win" for some states just to play to the left with our money."

Madame was pretty upset. As I was reading through the article before we posted it, I noticed she didn't refer to him as President Obama. That means she is pretty ticked! I can't wait until we write again. Hmm, I wonder what the next topic will be: unused stimulus money, the national deficit, cap and tax,or maybe more health care reform stuff. She always surprises me.

On another note, I'd like to congratulate Madame on passing 800,000 Facebook followers. She's becoming even more and more popular! Also, did you see my new page header at the top? I'd like to give a shout out to Alex Raye, one of the member of another one of Madame's facebook groups. She did an excellent photo editing job!

Monday, August 17, 2009

Apparently Madame 45 and I can defy Twitter character limits!

I had some down time today, so I decided that I would click myself onto Mozilla Firefox and do a google search of all of the work that Madame 45 and I have been doing lately. I have to admit that I like to see myself mentioned in print; I don't have quite the servant's heart that Madame does. My goodness, there is so much coverage! If you type in "Sarah Palin" and "death panels", you get more than 613,000 results on google. Now some people can't seem to understand what Madame was talking about with her posts.

There are some, however, who understand the message that we are trying to put out there. One of these people is Bernie Quigley blogging for The Hill. Here is an excerpt of his post:

Although completely unknown to the world east and south of Juneau one year ago, two words on Twitter by Sarah Palin sent the president of the United States in a panic to the op-ed page of the Sunday New York Times in opposition.

It should have been a great week for Newt Gingrich. He said last week there should be questions about federal bureaucrats running this thing; there should be questions about something so heartbreaking as the death of a loved one being footnoted in an indecipherable bill hundreds of pages long; there should be questions about euthanasia. Gingrich is their idea man and the press has been listening to his ideas and responding now for 20-some years. But this time he was passed over and ignored, because Sarah Palin, Citizen and Renegade, echoed these sentiments in a short, singular declarative sentence on Twitter.

One of the major networks began its coverage of the protests at the town halls last week with a commentary about Palin’s brief Twitter message, darkly suggesting that these demonstrations were un-American and were instigated by Palin. Then, seen through an airport window at the end of last week, Fox News, which supports Palin and opposes the ObamaCare plan, presented the story with a bright picture of Palin
at the upper left top and Obama in a submissive scowl to the right and below.

Now, this write up was a lot more positive than most, so I don't want to deride it completely. However, Mr. Quigley doesn't correctly identify the social medium that Madame and I use for our health care reform messages!

Now our original health care reform post on Facebook was 1,853 characters long! I suppose we could have tweeted this message, but it would have taken 14 tweets to complete! Plus, although the Complete Nonsense Network, er, I mean CNN, had reported that we had a new Twitter account, this has not happened yet. Now, Madame is pretty amazing, and she truly resonates with people. Some would say even that she is Chuck Norrisesque, but she can't defy the Twitter character limits. I will give props to Mr. Quigley,though, he gets it better than most!

Ah, I miss Twitter. I wonder when Madame and I will return? We shall see! If you wish to reminisce of Madame's time tweeting as governor, check out her Twitter page.

If you wish to see a good write up on Quigley's article, check out Doug Brady's article at Conservatives4Palin.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

"Silly LOTUS, czars are for socialists"

When I first began working with Madame 45, I have to admit that I was a bit power hungry. On my first day, I asked her, "So, now that I have the esteemed privilege of working with you, what's my title going to be? Can I be the Information Dissemination Czar?"

Madame 45 said nicely, but firmly, "Silly LOTUS, czars are for socialists. Besides, you don't need a title to make a difference".

Boy, was I humbled when I heard that. It is so true! I don't need to be a czar to help Madame 45 make a difference! The Great Opologizer (that's what Madame 45 calls President Obama) has more czars than Russia has ever had.

I had a conversation with a friend of mine who worked as the video camera at the World Trade Center Alaska Economic Forecast on January 24, 2008. He pulled a video out of his archives to show me what Madame 45 thought of czars even before the Great Opologizer took office. As I mentioned in a previous post, Madame 45 and I always want to keep things in context, so I have posted the entire video. To hear what Madame 45 thinks about czars, check out the 4:59 mark and the following 10 seconds or so.

H/T Nancy, commenter at C4P, for the suggestion of Madame 45's name for President Obama

Saturday, August 15, 2009

I had my first interview today!

I was honored (and a bit nervous) to have my first interview today with a great Madame 45 blog! I really enjoyed talking with a fellow Alaskan, Upinak.

I surfed over to the blog and ctrl-v-ed it here.


" I am extremely excited for The Palination to have their FIRST interview with LOTUS (Laptop of the Unites States). LOTUS is a great friend and working companion of Sarah Palin and is very important to Former Governor Palin's research in reacting to the widely unpopular bills that are running through the Obama Administration.

upinak: LOTUS, since you seem to be a very lucky laptop, how do you feel working for Madame 45?

LOTUS: I feel very blessed. She is such an amazing woman to work for. For one, I've heard from so many of my friends who have gotten coffee spilled on them. Madame 45 loves her skinny white chocolate mochas, but never once has she spilled on me! We also have the same technological philosophy. We feel it's important to attach our name to what we write. Madame says that " pathetic anonymous bloggers" annoy her, and I agree! Anything that we work on, we make sure that Madame's name is attached. She believes in personal responsibility, and that applies to taking responsibility for what you write on the internet.

upinak: LOTUS, do you feel over used when Madame 45 is multi tasking, such as googling, researching and downloading while Madame 45 is writing her expose on the woes of the Obama Administration and the publicly unpopular bills trying to be passed?

LOTUS: I don't really feel overused. Don't get me wrong, it is hard work! Madame made sure that I was a well-built, so that when we have a lot going on my CPU usage isn't too high. I know we are doing the right thing though. My great, great grandmother worked in the Reagan administration. From what she told me about working for him and what he stood for, he and Madame seem so much alike. We may be very busy, and the job is very tiring. But, I know we're on the right track.

upinak: LOTUS, are you excited to be traveling with Madame 45 across the United States and have you met any other Politician Wireless Gadgets?
LOTUS: I love it when we get the chance to travel. It was fun visiting New York recently. I look forward to when we get to travel throughout the country to help campaign for conservative candidates in 2010. That will be a lot of fun. I did get to meet Mayor Guliani's cell phone when we went to New York early this summer. We got to hang out while Madame and the Mayor were at the Yankees' game. We had a good conversation, although it was a little hard to communicate. He could only speak with 160 characters at a time.

upinak: LOTUS, I understand you are uploaded with hundreds of different songs for the Madame's Ipod. Which do you enjoy playing as you upload and recharge the Ipod of Madame 45?

LOTUS: That's a great question. Yes, she has quite the collection. I would say that I really like playing Van Halen and Hannah Montana because they remind me of the kids. Trig's name was made to rhyme with Van Halen; it's Trig Paxson Van Palin. Piper is a big Hannah Montana fan. However, when we are working on something, I like to have "Barracuda" by Heart playing. One line has been running through my hard drive a lot lately as we've tried to de-rail the Softy Southpaws' health care plan: " You lying so low in the weeds. Bet you gonna ambush me.You'd have me down on my knees.Wouldn't you, Barracuda?" I think that the President Obama is thinking that about Madame Barracuda.

upinak: LOTUS, do you want to meet TOTUS one day?

LOTUS: I do. We talk frequently, but I haven't had the chance to meet him. Perhaps we will meet in Washington someday.I've had to explain some things to him that he does not understand like facts, conservatism, and free market principles. I feel bad for the poor guy. He is so overworked! I know the TOAK (the Teleprompter of Alaska) too, and he didn't have nearly is as much work to do. You see, back when Madame was governor, she rarely used the TOAK. She just spoke using notes that we typed up, and she referenced during her speeches.

upinak: Well LOTUS, I appreciate the time out of yours and Madame 45's busy schedule to speak with me. This was a great experience and I hope we may have a few more interviews with you in the future.

To visit with LOTUS, please go to LOTUS's blog and say hello. LOTUS enjoys interacting with many and is obviously a fan of music!

Thank you for reading our exclusive interview. I hope that we have many more in the future with many other political figures around the country.


Cross posted at Palination.

Madame 45 likes to run

One thing that I have discovered about Madame 45 is that she likes to run, and I don't just mean in the athletic sense. She likes to run an offense, a town, oil and gas commission meetings, a state. She also enjoys co-running a family. We'll have to see if she has her sights set on running a country. Time will tell. She always seems to be acutely aware of "open doors" or "doors that are cracked" opened.

Today was a little less busy today on the LOTUS front; you see the big post was only at about 8:30 PM yesterday here in Alaska. I was proud of Madame for putting the Softy Southpaws (that's what Madame calls liberals) in their place. Madame has gotten used to being taken out-of-context and smeared, so she fights back. She is a fighter. She talked about her proclamation of Healthcare Decisions Day as governor and put it into context. You see, it's not very often that her words are put into context, so she decided to do it herself. She compared what was in the House bill with her proclamation of Healthcare Decisions Day and said they were as different as apples and oranges. The two policies are really that different! She wasn't just using that example in order to get votes from Washington state and Florida if she decides to run in 2012. Oh, and I must say, she was pretty excited about the provision being taken out the Senate bill, but she's not done yet!

We only really had one post today-- a statement from the American College of Surgeons. Apparently, the President made some comment about how much surgeries cost, and he was way off. You see, Madame is so good with budgeting and being fiscally responsible both in government and at home. You should see the budgeting excel spreadsheets I have saved on my hard drive! She just can't understand how the President could overestimate the cost of a foot amputation but completely underestimate the cost of the his health care plan. It's so simple to her!

But, I should get back to the running. Since it was a slower day for us, Madame went for a long run. She used me to charge her ipod. She has quite the eclectic collection of music on itunes: AC/DC, some country, some Amy Grant. I've always wanted to go on a run with her. I don't get what's the big deal. I AM portable!? Oh well, Madame's pretty speedy, so my processor probably couldn't keep up anyway. She's a tough one; she says her ankle hurts her sometimes when she runs; it's from an old high school basketball injury. Yet, she still runs. If I had a sore backspace key, I don't know if I could do it. I guess it's because running gives her sanity in this crazy world.

Friday, August 14, 2009

A message from the LOTUS ( the Laptop of the United States)

It has been quite the busy week since returning from New York. Madame 45 (that's what I call Governor Palin) and I have been writing up a storm the past several days. We've spent a lot of time on Microsoft Word because Madame wants to make sure that her footnotes were formatted correctly ( I prefer to call them heelnotes-- Madame has a great shoe collection). But, I haven't just spent time on Microsoft Word. We have spent a lot of time on Google and Pub Med. Madame 45 does such a good job supporting her thoughts on TOTUS's health care plan with these things called facts. Now, I'm good friends with the TOTUS, and he was unfamiliar with "facts". Apparently, they don't come across his screen too often. I was happy to describe this concept to him. I want to make sure that he understands facts. If he happens to be kept on staff during the transition in 2012, he will see a lot of them. But, I digress.

We have also spent hours reading the House's health care bill. I'm glad that Madame 45 is good about the Adobe Reader updates, or I might have a malfunction. That pdf is long! But, I need to get used to the long hours. Madame 45 is writing a book too! I've seen some excerpts, and, doggone it, it is good! I don't want divulge too much information, but let me tell you, it is going to be huge! We may need another "stimulus" package next spring, and Madame's book will definitely provide a big boost to the paper, ink, and bookstore industry!

I've enjoyed spending time on facebook. It seems like every time we surf over to that site, there are more and more people who want to read what Madame 45 has written. I think it has had an effect too! I like to surf over to this site from time-to-time. I'm not really sure if Madame 45 knows that I do it, but maybe she visits sometimes too! I'm not sure!

On a lighter note, I love the Alaskan summers! The sun stays out so long! Sometimes, Madame 45 and I will sit out on the deck overlooking Lake Lucille. Sometimes she lets Trig and I spend some time together. It tickles when he tries to talk to me! I can't believe how big he is getting! He is precious, and it makes me so mad when people demean him! Piper and Willow are headed back to school soon! I will miss them. First Dude 45 is quite a guy too! He tells me about the salmon runs. Oh, I wish I could make a trip to Dillingham sometime, but I only have limited battery power. Plus, I'm hydrophobic. Bristol and Tripp are fun to be around too! I'm very proud of Bristol! I can't wait until Track gets back from Iraq! I'm so thankful for his service.

Ok, I suppose I should get back to work. We may possibly be spending some time on Twitter soon again. Although, Madame 45 often uses the BOTUS (Blackberry of the United States) for that job. Madame's friend Greta said on TV tonight that we may be skypeing soon. We'll see. I don't know if Greta was teasing or serious. I'll have to wait on the word from the boss.